3 June 2025
So, you wake up to the sound of your alarm, already 15 minutes late, coffee hasn’t brewed, your inbox is gasping for mercy, and you've somehow managed to wear two different socks. Again. Welcome to the modern jungle—where chaos reigns and self-care is…well, mostly just a Pinterest board you’ve been saving for “someday.”
Here’s the kicker: that “someday” doesn’t magically appear unless you make it. Yep, like putting on pants before a Zoom meeting, self-care won’t happen unless you actually decide to do it. The good news? It doesn’t have to be a luxury spa weekend or a two-hour yoga escape. Self-care can be messy, loud, imperfect—and still work magic.
Ready to finally figure out how to prioritize self-care without quitting your job or moving to a cabin in the woods? Cool, grab a glass of water (hydration, babe), and let’s dive into this.

What Even Is Self-Care?
Let’s address the glittery, bubble-bath-covered elephant in the room. Self-care is
not just spa days, green smoothies, or chanting under a full moon. (Although if chanting is your jam,
go you.)
Self-care is simply doing things that recharge your physical, mental, and emotional batteries.
Whether that’s saying no to yet another group project, eating a vegetable that isn’t deep-fried, or watching trashy reality TV in peace—it’s all valid.
Think of self-care as giving your “future self” a high-five.

The Chaos is Coming From Inside the House
Not to sound dramatic—but we’re living in the age of “hustle or die.” Between back-to-back meetings, Instagram-induced FOMO, and your cat demanding attention mid-Zoom call, it’s no wonder we treat self-care like a guilty pleasure instead of a non-negotiable.
But here’s the plot twist: you’re not a robot (unless you are, in which case, beep boop, carry on). You can’t give what you don’t have—so running on empty and still trying to serve everyone else? Classic burnout recipe.
Spoiler alert: when you prioritize self-care, you don't just feel better—you perform better, too. Mind-blowing, right?

Step 1: Redefine What Self-Care Looks Like for You
Hot tip: Self-care isn’t one size fits all. What feels like restoration to me might feel like torture to you (hi, early morning joggers—I don’t get it, but I respect it).
Ask Yourself:
- What activities make me feel most alive or grounded?
- What drains me, even if it “should” be fun?
- When was the last time I felt truly rested?
Now, take those answers and craft your own version of self-care. That could mean journaling, silent walks, baking banana bread, or aggressively deleting work emails after 6pm. If it recharges your energy tank, that’s your base.

Step 2: Set Boundaries Like a Boss (Without Guilt)
Ah yes, boundaries. Otherwise known as: “the polite way of telling people to back off.”
Let’s be honest—saying “no” is hard. But every time you say “yes” to something that drains you, you’re saying “no” to yourself. Ouch, right?
Some Friendly Boundary Tips:
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Use scripts: Practice saying “Thanks, but I’m not available for that right now.”
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Set time limits: One hour for social media scrolling is plenty (and yes, we all lie to Screen Time).
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Declare off-hours: Create actual “off” time in your schedule. Like, protect it with the fierceness of Beyoncé’s bodyguard.
Boundaries are more than fences—they’re filters for your peace.
Step 3: Build a Self-Care Routine That Doesn’t Feel Like Yet Another Job
Let’s be real—if your self-care plan is complex enough to require a personal assistant, it
probably won’t last past Wednesday. The key is consistency, not intensity.
Try the “Micro Self-Care” Approach:
Instead of waiting for a week-long vacay, sprinkle your day with 5-10 minute rituals:
- Stretch before checking your phone (I know, radical)
- Light a candle while working (bonus points if it smells like a coastal luxury villa)
- Take phone-free walks (yes, the world still exists without TikTok)
- Use the “bathroom break” strategy: bathroom = break. Period.
Tiny habits beat grand intentions every time.
Step 4: Declutter Your Time Like You Declutter That Junk Drawer
You know that drawer full of random phone chargers, mystery keys, and batteries from 2008? Yeah, your schedule looks like that too.
Let’s clean it up:
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Audit your calendar: What's ACTUALLY adding value? Nuke the rest.
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Automate life where you can: Grocery delivery, automated bill pay, text templates—this is your sign to outsource the boring stuff.
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Prioritize joy: If it's not a "heck yes," it's a "nope."
You wouldn’t keep expired ketchup in the fridge just because it’s “been there a while.” Same goes for outdated commitments.
Step 5: Make It Social (Yes, Really)
Okay, this sounds counterproductive. “How is adding people to my chaos going to help?” Hear me out.
The right people don’t add to your chaos—they help you carry it.
Ways to Make Self-Care Social:
- Workout buddies = mutual suffering, shared sweat, and post-gym smoothies
- Digital detox hangouts: challenge friends to a no-phone dinner
- Group chats that aren’t just memes (although those help, too)
- Accountability pals: Remind each other to actually take breaks
It’s not about being the social butterfly. It’s about finding butterflies who flap in the same direction.
Step 6: Kill the Perfectionist Within (Nicely…)
If your idea of self-care involves doing everything “right,” congrats—you’ve accidentally created another to-do list to stress over. Perfectionism is that smug little gremlin whispering, “If you can’t do it all, don’t do anything.”
Let’s kick that gremlin to the curb.
Accept Imperfect Self-Care:
- You meditated for 3 minutes instead of 30? Win.
- You journaled a shopping list instead of deep thoughts? Still counts.
- You took a nap instead of doing yoga? Spoiler: naps are yoga for the soul.
Progress > Perfection. Always.
Step 7: Turn Chaos into a Self-Care Trigger
Here’s a spicy idea: what if chaos could
remind you to care for yourself?
Let’s flip the script. Use stress as a siren, not a sign of failure.
Examples:
- Feeling overwhelmed? Time to breathe deeply—not doom-scroll.
- Too many meetings? Schedule 15 mins of nothing between them.
- Cranky? That’s your body requesting water, sleep, or a snack. (It’s not just being rude.)
Train your brain to see stress as a prompt, not a punishment.
Step 8: Make It a Lifestyle, Not a Lifeline
Here's the kicker. Self-care isn’t what you turn to when you're on the verge of a meltdown. It’s what you use to avoid the meltdown in the first place.
Think of it like brushing your teeth. You don’t wait until your teeth fall out, right? Same idea—only now, your mental health is your enamel.
Embed Self-Care into Daily Life:
- Set calendar reminders to check in with yourself
- Tie self-care to existing habits (tea time = 5 minutes of breathing)
- Have a “WTF Plan” for intense days (e.g., emergency naps, feel-good playlists, a motivational sticky note from your past self)
Consistency is sexy, and it doesn’t require perfection.
TL;DR: You Deserve to Put Yourself First (Like, Yesterday)
Look, adulting is hard. Life is messy. And no one is giving out gold stars for skipping lunch to answer emails faster. But you? You're allowed to take a break. To rest. To
not be available. To binge-watch bad TV without guilt. To wake up and choose
you—every single time.
Self-care isn’t selfish. It’s survival. And you’re already doing better than you think.
Now go chug some water, cancel that plan you’re dreading, and remind yourself: you are not the chaos—you’re the calm inside it.